Dance

I remember a friend telling me how he got people to take up dance: he would convince his female friends first, and they would pull their significant others to partner them. I’ve included a sample conversation illustrating how this Herculean task is accomplished.

Girl: Do you love me?
Guy: *groans in silence* Of course I do.
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Guy: *groans again, this time slightly more audible* But of course, my dear.
Girl: Good. I’m thinking of taking dance lessons and I need a partner…
Guy: *groans again, this time very audible* No!!! Not dance…
Girl: Didn’t you just say that you love me, and that you would do anything for me?
Guy: But, but, dancing…
Girl: I really want to go for classes, and I don’t want other guys touching me… I don’t think you would like that too…

At this point, it’s over. Any last-ditch resistance is for show only, and soon he will capitulate.

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I take a slightly different tact when convincing my friends.

H: Dude, grow a penis. Dancing is for faggots.
Me: Dude, there were twenty other girls in the room. I was the only guy. And you know how hot dancers are.
H: You are joking!
H: No I’m not.

One month later…

H: Hey Daniel, remember the other time you were telling me about dance? I was wondering if you could recommend a studio.

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I wonder if girls are turned off if they find out that some of the guys they are dancing with don’t exactly have the noblest of intentions. I remember a conversation with my dance partner.

Me: I’ve some friends who are interested in dance.
Rox: Oh really, that’s good! So hard to find such guys nowadays!
Me: Well, actually, I think they want to meet girls through dance.
Rox: What the heck… I can’t stand guys like that… We are there to dance not to be picked up!
Me: *cleverly remain silent*